Three Ingredients for Happiness You’re Probably Ignoring

Is there a part of you that has always wanted to do something, but you’ve ignored it because it never felt like the right time?  Maybe it was a little too outside your comfort zone, but you secretly wished you were bold enough to do it?  Did you give up on something because life happened and “more important” things became a bigger priority?

I know for myself, I’ve always felt there was something more for me; a bigger game to play, than what I have done so far.

Saturday: Day 5 of Simple Abundance: “The Woman You Were Meant to Be”

On day five Sarah talks about the woman inside who we’ve ignored for decades, reminding us that she’s still there waiting for us to recognize her and reconnect with who we were meant to be.

I think, for the most part, I’ve mostly lived as the woman I’m meant to be.  I have never been one to be someone else to try to fit in.  I’m pretty outspoken in most situations and often wish my internal editor was a little more effective at stopping the avalanche of inappropriate things that spill from my mouth at inopportune times.  I speak my mind, what’s on my heart, and what’s happening in my life.

I also don’t do a lot of things that I don’t want to do.  If I’m in the mood, my house is beautiful, if I’m not, well then you’ll just have to step over whatever clutter is in your path.

But there are things I’ve wanted to do that I’ve put off because of other priorities.  I’ve tried twice to get my private pilot’s licence and quit the first time because I fell in love and was distracted, the second because I was pregnant and was quickly not going to be able to pull the yoke back far enough to take off. I also truly loved pottery, sculpting, painting, jewelry making and photography before kids.  I’ve talked about these things a lot recently but it’s all been hot air.  I bought a box of clay a couple of months ago, that’s sitting on the pottery wheel in the garage which has not been turned on in about 16 years.  Maybe my authentic self is telling me it’s time to carve out some time for me to “play?”

Saturday, January 5, 2013: Gratitude Journal

Sunday’s lesson was perfect timing for me.  My eyes sting tonight from crying.  You know those kind of tears that combined with being overtired make you wonder when they’ll stop after the floodgates open?  I’m struggling with a challenge that for a while tonight got the best of me.

I did what I always do, I talked to my husband and my mom.  After going through the whole situation with both of them sharing my anger, frustration and overwhelm with the situation, I dried my tears and put on a happy face for the evening.  But a stubborn 5 year old not wanting to get out of the tub, work stuff hanging over my head, and seeing the pile of clean clothes on the bed that needed to be put way, were enough to make me want to slip into tears again as I slid between the sheets.

Really?  After focusing on gratitude for the last week, I’m laying her having a pity party for myself?  You betcha. When I first started this personal development journey way back when I started my Arbonne business I felt like I always needed to be positive.  I wouldn’t let myself feel negative emotions, but I’ve learned that sometime’s it’s just what we need to diffuse the energy enough that we can reframe our situation and look at it differently.

In the past my down moments would be down days, but I’ve learned that for myself there is no faster way to pull my feelings out of the pit of dispair, (okay I’m being a little dramatic here) than helping someone else in need or remembering what I have to be grateful for.

Monday, January 7, 2013: Gratitude Journal

Simple Abundance day 7: “How Happy are You Right Now?”

Do you know what makes you happy?  Are you enjoying your life?  It’s hard  acknowledge those times when you’re happiest if you don’t know that you truly love. Sarah says, “We must learn to savor the small authentic moments that bring us contentment.”

This is going to sound silly because I hate the task, but I absolutely love the feeling of folding warm clothes out of the dryer or hand washing dishes, feeling the warm water wash over my hands.  I love having someone blow-dry my hair.  I love how the frozen air smells, when I’m standing outside in a snowfall or on a super frosty cold day.  It reminds me of the clean smell of a newborn’s breath.  I realized a couple of weeks ago that an ice-skating rink smells simliar, although not exactly the same.  I love watching my children sleep and seeing them playing at school when they don’t know I’m watching.  I love telling them “yes” to something they never in a million years thought I’d agree to it and seeing their puzzled faces when they realize I said, “yes,” and that they still haven’t figured me out.  (I love even more that even though they think I’ll say, “no,” they still ask!)

This is the year to recognize and embrace the minute details and simple moments that bring us happiness.

Three Ingredients to Happiness:

1. So what are the things you are taking for granted that you have to be grateful for?  Start to become consciously aware of all the things you have to be grateful for in your life.
2. What is your authentic self whispering to your heart, calling you to do? Listen to her and set aside some time to play with the ideas she has.
3. What brings you contentment and happiness?  Instead of always focusing on what makes your kids, spouse, boss, and friends happy, start to notice the moments in your life when you feel happy.

Heather Stephens

Heather C. Stephens is a serial blogger who writes on Becoming-Me.com about personal development, personal finance, weight loss as well as her many adventures as a mom of three. She also is a blogger for FatWallet.com where she shares money saving shopping tips and deal guides to help people stretch their dollar.

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